When we were infants, we were dependent on our societies. Our basic needs were all fulfilled by our families and relatives we grew up with. Besides being dependent on them for our basic needs, there are other things that we were also reliant on or influenced by. One of them is our personalities. Our personalities reflect our societies we grew up in. All the things that had happened in our societies had somehow influenced how we represent ourselves today. They are called our agents of socialization. In “Farmworker’s Daughter” by Rose Castillo Guilbault, she tells us about her personal history which had built her character and personality. After reading the novel, I found many similar experiences of primary socialization that helped me to understand the way families, friends and everybody in our societies can be strong influencing factors which molds us into who we are today.
Rose was raised up in a poor family. She always had to struggle to get what she wanted because of her financial status. She worked very hard when she wanted to go on vacation to Mexico as she said “I wanted to go on vacation like so many of my classmates, but my parents couldn’t afford it” (Guilbault 96). Unlike many other kids, she had to rely on herself to get what she wanted. Her father also helped her in getting her ‘’independent character’’. Once, when Rose’s mother helped her to ask for a doll from her father, he replied, “you’ll spoil her by giving in to anything she wants” ( Guilbault 14). Her father was very strict to her. He did not want her to be a spoilt child and thus never give what she wanted easily. Rose had to work hard for everything she wanted but after she has attained it, she will appreciate and cherish what she has. Her strong character was built by these past experiences in her society.
Her case was pretty similar to mine except that I grow up in a family with moderate economic status but my parents never let me get anything I want easily because they want me to work for it instead. By doing this way they train me to be prudent in managing my finance as I believe that I have to work for anything I want.
Rose mother’s decision with regards to her divorce was a very brave one in the Mexican society as it was considered a taboo and unacceptable. She writes “my generation would create no-vault divorce, but in my mother’s time and place a woman was expected to endure whatever her marriage brought” (Guilbault 18). The choice she made was defiant but bold enough to contradict her family tradition and moved to USA without any proficiency to keep her survived. I believe Rose was affected by this choice a lot, not only the endurance but also her personality. Seeing her mother broke the family rule and took the next step of immigrating to USA, she was trained to stand on her own decision and be strong to take it.
Although Rose mother did not follow the tradition of keeping the marriage but she was still conservative. She did not allow Rose to be influenced by the western culture and stood to her tradition when she said “Nice girls don’t go around walking with strange boys. You don’t know their families” (Guilbault 153). Rose’s mother scolded her when she discovered that Rose wanted to exchange phone with strangers. She did not want Rose to go out with outsiders and keep the woman’s pride. The effect was obvious when Rose went out with her girlfriends and felt uncomfortable when they started to hang around with soldiers who were strangers. She was not influenced by her friends and tried to keep her pride when she said “I sit with my back turned to the traffic, praying no one sees me hanging out with doggies” (Guilbault 154). At that time going out with soldiers whom she called doggies was considered contemptible. She kept her mother‘s advice in her mind as she went home.
My family is quite conservative like Rose’s family who opposed divorce among couple. My parents are greatly influenced by their Chinese ancestors and thus they are not accepting some of the western cultures like blind date. They have strong hypothesis that women are prohibited to have sex before marriage in order to keep their pride. Indecent relationships will be the attraction catcher in my family. They will be the topic of denigration and in a twinkling of an eye the rumor is spread to all the members. My family disapproves gay marriage as well. I grow up in a modern era where technology becomes part of me. Although when I was young the exposure of modern life in my country was not very obvious but through media young kids were globalized and became more open-minded. I do adhere to the believes that my parents have but my acceptance of the unpleasant things that are happening out there is bigger than theirs. My growing society doesn’t really make me grasp to the traditional Chinese norm but I still hold to some of them and apply it to my daily activities. The society in which I grow makes me partially conservative.
She was raised in a poor family but exposed to the luxury at the same time. Many rich people were having prejudice to her. There was one event when she said “My mother suspected aunt Tere did not want her friends from la sociedad to know we were farmworkers” (Guilbault 105) proved that she was discriminated. I believe this force her to be acceptance to her fate. She never complained about her financial status. Seeing her friends got to eat expensive food which she couldn’t have, she accepted it and didn’t whine for it like what most kids do. She just went home and didn’t complain to her mother at all. The society had shaped her up into an accepting girl.
I experienced the situations in which I cannot do anything but to accept my life. Like when I was young, my parents never brought me for vacation when most of my friends were boastful about their trips. I tried very hard to coax them to have a family vacation but I never succeed. In the end I could not do anything and accept the fact that they do not like moving around. This helps me in my later life when I realized there are many things I just cannot have even after I worked hard for it. I believe that makes me never envy my friends for having things I do not have and be grateful in any situation.
Environments, besides family, also have influences for us. For teenagers, famous people often give inspiration and move us on towards our goals. Rose was influenced by Beatles, a band that was popular at that era. Not only her that was influenced by this band but other teenagers as well. Her friend was too carried away by the Beatles that “She and BJ and some other friends had formed a musical group called the Screamies. It was their strategy for meeting the Beatles” (Guilbault 128). Rose, knowing that her friends formed a band to meet Beatles, had a wit to meet the Beatles also that is to join the “Screamies”. I believe her personality is changed by the Beatles by making her work to reach her goal with more socialization with other people which also gave her more friends. I believe Beatles made her realized that there were limitations to many things after “Screamies” was dispersed when she said “I was drawn to their ambitious vision that challenged the limited possibilities of our rural existence” (Guilbault 131). She gave up on her dream about meeting Beatles thereafter.
I am greatly influenced by a pianist named Richard Clayderman. I listen to his songs a lot and he always becomes the topic in my conversations with my friend who has the same interest with me. He is my role model in finding my interest which is playing music instrument. I began to practice piano harder after I was influenced by him and later on I found that music is a big part of my life. After I knew how to play piano I listen to music everyday. I never skip a day without music. I believe I have built my personality through him. Music makes my day brighter and leads me to a dream of becoming a composer although I am not majoring in music. As there is never an end for music, I always have a topic to talk to my friends, music. This makes me have a lot more friends. The popular trend for music is changing with time and I believe my passion in music is the reason why I always follow the changes. Not only the trends in music I have followed but I update the trends in many other things that the popular culture experience.
In our lives we always have someone who becomes a role model for us that gives us inspiration that keep us going. In her case her teacher, Mrs. Rojas, was the role model. She was a Mexican immigrant who never let any problems became obstacles that refrained her in pursuing her dream to become a teacher. Rose was facing the same problem of discrimination, poverty and loneliness as an immigrant. By knowing that it’s not only her that experienced the hardships I believe will make Rose stronger. Rose was influenced by Mrs. Rojas who never gave up her dream which made Rose continue pursuing her dream. I believe Mrs. Rojas affected Rose’s life and made her never give up.
I also have a role model which is my friend. She has a very chaotic family condition. Since young she was exposed to the affair that her father has and she has to bear her mother’s burden as her mother always confides to her every single miserable condition. What move my heart is the fact that she never give up. She never surrenders her life but keep move on. I am influenced by how hard she works to achieve her dream and never give herself a limitation. Although I know she has to bear her family problem but a smiley face is always drawn on her face and achievements at her studies are still a part of her life. By seeing her achievements, I become more diligent in my studies. When I am about to give up, remembering her life story gives me a power to move on.
By comparing Rose society to how she behaves, there is an interrelated connection. The same thing happens to my personality. There is a link between my current me to the environment in which I grew up. My relatives and friends have always been there to help become a better person. Whatever my parents do to me will shape me up into myself. Every single problem that I face trains me to become a tougher and definitely better person. This happened to Rose as well. Problems, discriminations and dilemma that Rose experienced make her stronger and tougher. Every event that had happened in our lives affects not only ourselves but also the way we interact to many different situations and thus our societies mold our personalities.
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